Okay, so this pregnancy thing is really starting to get funnier by the day....It seems that each day is a new adventure for me and my body. Each day it gets a little harder to get out of bed. Not because I am tired but because my belly is bigger. Each day it seems it takes longer to take the dog on a walk. We still go the same route, same time of morning, same pee stops for him, same bushes and posts to sniff, but it is taking longer for me to walk it. Each day my pregnant waddle becomes more and more obvious. Each day it's harder to see my ankles. Every other day I am drinking through yet another gallon of milk and orange juice. Each day my bed time seems earlier. Each night I pee more and more frequently....
So basically I am entering my 30th week of this journey. Wow.. 30 weeks of having my little man grow inside me. It really is incredible. He is moving so much and it makes me so happy. Dan loved to put his face on my belly and have the baby kick him in the face. It's really neat. I am looking forward to the next time I get to see him on an ultra-sound, not next week but maybe sometime in late Jan or early Feb. Things are still holding strong for the little man to come out of me via C-Section anywhere between the 3rd and the 11th of march. I am leaving it up to the doctor to tell me when...
January is a busy month with baby stuff going on, in lew of all the family stuff too, but right now I am looking forward to the appointments and the shower and the classes and more that is happening...but I will share a few things with you that I have noticed.
I really do not mind showing my belly off to people. They want to touch it, okay... as long as I know who you are...
I have actually had a really good time in being pregnant. I mean some people don't like it and some people are ashamed and some people have only negative things to say.. but I have found it more and more enjoyable and actually funny than anything.
My belly seems like it has popped overnight. Dan looks at me and will say.."Shit honey, your belly is REALLY getting big." It's true I know it is.
I do not have a protruding naval and I wonder if I will get one.
I cannot wait to do my belly cast and Dan wants to hang it over our bed.
The other day Dan told me how pretty I looked, and I cried because I thought it was the nicest thing he has ever told me... My emotions are running high...tears can come at any moment.. I would be a good soap opera actress. I can cry on cue now...
The other day, I had THE most pregnant moment EVER.... walking out of work with a my friend Michelle, I commented on how humid it was...(really, my forever bitch is the humid weather this winter) anyway when I got into the car I had a coughing fit. When the weather is humid all I do is cough..ever since my little stint at the ER with an upper chest infection, I cough a lot...It is now subsiding but as long as there is no humidity...So I am driving home and by the way it is Christmas Eve... I turn the corner off the main road to get onto the connecting street, right at the turn at the Little Italy restaurant and it happens. I cough so hard I pee...yup, I coughed again and I peed again. Two time in my NEW pants that Dan just got me. I get out of the car and felt my pants and yup. Pee. Dan has the door open for me and the house is nice and he has a few special things planned for Christmas eve.. and I raced in the house and stripped down, telling him not to get any ideas and that I had just peed my pants 'cause I coughed so hard.... We laughed a lot. It was funny.
I am sure there is more to come and that it will just be funnier as time gets closer. Like the stuff that will come out of my boobs before the baby is even born. The greatest thing about this journey for me and I will include my husband on this one, it that we have laughed so much at the changes that are happening and we have embraced them with so much humor and open hearts and full honesty. My questions to people are those that the book does not tell you. I ask honest questions, I get honest answers...and I like that. If I were younger, I would do this again, but one child is all we will have and all we really want. So it has been a wonder pregnancy and all the funny things that goes with this...
Peeing my pants... may just be breaking the ice for the rest of the stuff that happens to me in the next seven weeks...I don't mind at all. "Bring it all on" I say. I am ready for it. So it will be fun to see what will happen. I guess it all comes with the territory....
Sunday, December 27, 2009
Saturday, December 26, 2009
One Of The Best...
It was a special Christmas for me this year... Lots of people have said to me...."You and Danny will have a great Christmas because it's your last one alone...next year there will be a baby." and I smile.
Yeah that's kind of true it IS our last year as the two of us. But it has been a busy month and nothing to do with the baby. We really chose this year to take a different route when it came to Christmas, and to be honest I really liked the way it all fell into place. It was very much out of the norm but felt totally right.
As the Mayo family we celebrated a few days early since we all had to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. And that celebreation was wonderful. So nice, few gifts to exchange, because as we get older we really see how we don't need things we just need each other. This I find to be more important than the gifts. I can never ask for things anymore, I just ask for togetherness.
Christmas Day after work my mom came to our house and Danny did a great job of cooking cheeseburgers on the grille. I know it sounds funny to have cheeseburgers but it was just what mom wanted and it was so nice to not worry about the big feast. We sat relaxed sharing stories.
We then proceeded to go to the Hospital downtown Naples to see Danny's father who has been there for almost two weeks now. He suffered a stroke and has had so many complications. It has been a rough journey for him and Dan and Dan's sister Donna.
It was an unsettling way to end the beautiful holiday but a very important way to end it. To me seeing my father in law in his state, wrenched my heart. I did everything in my power not to cry because he looks so sad in his eyes and uncomfortable. I don't know what to say. When my own father was sick it was hard to see too, but they are two totally different men with completely different happenings. With Bobby you just cannot communicate well, my dad was talking up to the last few hours it seemed. I don't know really. All I pray for in this situation is God's Will to be done. God's will not anyone else's. My husband was so sad last night and almost embarrassed that he took mom and I into this situation. I understand his concern, but you have to know all the time that mom and I have spent at hospitals with people, our own family or someone else's... It's just natural for us... even like going to the cemetery... it's like an Italian thing... you just do it. Unphasing but sorrowful, if that makes any sense.
Once Bobby got settled and we came home, we were tired. Dan kept apologizing to me for the end of Christmas and his sorrow. I could not help but think in my mind, that this really was a perfect Christmas...sounds funny, but it has helped me think about the future. We will have a child in our midst next year, and it will be special, but the thing that I really need to work on is centering this holiday with family and not the GREAT notion of gifts and stuff. Yeah go ahead and spoil my kid, but when it comes down to it, Joey will know that there are so many out there who are alone and who do not receive and it's about giving....Just as we were given this gift of the life of Jesus. I will never rule out the magic of Santa to our son. Santa brings so much happiness and wonder to children....but he will know as he grows, even young, that maybe delivering food to home bound people, or casting a few gifts for seniors or children in need or giving of himself or the family for others is what the season needs to be about. Doing our part. My parents did that with us and it humbles you in such a cold society. I hope I am able to hold myself to this writing and this notion....
There were plenty of people walking out of the hospital last night alone. I have no idea of their stories and why they were there and if they were leaving a child or a spouse behind and going home to end their Christmas alone. I cant get that out of my head. Nor can I get my husbands pain out of my heart and the image of his dad laying there out of my thoughts...I need these reminders to tell me that not everything is going my way and not everything is all pretty and rosy and about the baby that I carry. And that I cannot have everything I want. There are so many things that are listed on my calender for the next few months, but they are not as important as being there for my husband as this trek that takes him through the trenches he is in at the moment.
We really had the calmest Christmas I could have ever had at home and I loved it that way. The pressure of life was far more important to us than the pressure of gifts and competing and food and dressing up and more...just to sit with each other and share the emotion of feeling..and what we were feeling. I cant ask for much more at the moment. I will be here as long as he needs me to be and I will be here when he asks be to be...I Will not smother my husband unless he wants me. I need to be submissive and respectful as Dan was when my dad was sick and when he passed.
With all this blabbering on, it could be hard for you reading this to think that Dan and Missy Williams had a nice Christmas, but you know what we did. There was a lot that came out of the past twenty four hours and Christ shone through majestically. A mountain of toys could never replace what we did this year. Although sounds quirky, it had to have been one of the best.
Yeah that's kind of true it IS our last year as the two of us. But it has been a busy month and nothing to do with the baby. We really chose this year to take a different route when it came to Christmas, and to be honest I really liked the way it all fell into place. It was very much out of the norm but felt totally right.
As the Mayo family we celebrated a few days early since we all had to work on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. And that celebreation was wonderful. So nice, few gifts to exchange, because as we get older we really see how we don't need things we just need each other. This I find to be more important than the gifts. I can never ask for things anymore, I just ask for togetherness.
Christmas Day after work my mom came to our house and Danny did a great job of cooking cheeseburgers on the grille. I know it sounds funny to have cheeseburgers but it was just what mom wanted and it was so nice to not worry about the big feast. We sat relaxed sharing stories.
We then proceeded to go to the Hospital downtown Naples to see Danny's father who has been there for almost two weeks now. He suffered a stroke and has had so many complications. It has been a rough journey for him and Dan and Dan's sister Donna.
It was an unsettling way to end the beautiful holiday but a very important way to end it. To me seeing my father in law in his state, wrenched my heart. I did everything in my power not to cry because he looks so sad in his eyes and uncomfortable. I don't know what to say. When my own father was sick it was hard to see too, but they are two totally different men with completely different happenings. With Bobby you just cannot communicate well, my dad was talking up to the last few hours it seemed. I don't know really. All I pray for in this situation is God's Will to be done. God's will not anyone else's. My husband was so sad last night and almost embarrassed that he took mom and I into this situation. I understand his concern, but you have to know all the time that mom and I have spent at hospitals with people, our own family or someone else's... It's just natural for us... even like going to the cemetery... it's like an Italian thing... you just do it. Unphasing but sorrowful, if that makes any sense.
Once Bobby got settled and we came home, we were tired. Dan kept apologizing to me for the end of Christmas and his sorrow. I could not help but think in my mind, that this really was a perfect Christmas...sounds funny, but it has helped me think about the future. We will have a child in our midst next year, and it will be special, but the thing that I really need to work on is centering this holiday with family and not the GREAT notion of gifts and stuff. Yeah go ahead and spoil my kid, but when it comes down to it, Joey will know that there are so many out there who are alone and who do not receive and it's about giving....Just as we were given this gift of the life of Jesus. I will never rule out the magic of Santa to our son. Santa brings so much happiness and wonder to children....but he will know as he grows, even young, that maybe delivering food to home bound people, or casting a few gifts for seniors or children in need or giving of himself or the family for others is what the season needs to be about. Doing our part. My parents did that with us and it humbles you in such a cold society. I hope I am able to hold myself to this writing and this notion....
There were plenty of people walking out of the hospital last night alone. I have no idea of their stories and why they were there and if they were leaving a child or a spouse behind and going home to end their Christmas alone. I cant get that out of my head. Nor can I get my husbands pain out of my heart and the image of his dad laying there out of my thoughts...I need these reminders to tell me that not everything is going my way and not everything is all pretty and rosy and about the baby that I carry. And that I cannot have everything I want. There are so many things that are listed on my calender for the next few months, but they are not as important as being there for my husband as this trek that takes him through the trenches he is in at the moment.
We really had the calmest Christmas I could have ever had at home and I loved it that way. The pressure of life was far more important to us than the pressure of gifts and competing and food and dressing up and more...just to sit with each other and share the emotion of feeling..and what we were feeling. I cant ask for much more at the moment. I will be here as long as he needs me to be and I will be here when he asks be to be...I Will not smother my husband unless he wants me. I need to be submissive and respectful as Dan was when my dad was sick and when he passed.
With all this blabbering on, it could be hard for you reading this to think that Dan and Missy Williams had a nice Christmas, but you know what we did. There was a lot that came out of the past twenty four hours and Christ shone through majestically. A mountain of toys could never replace what we did this year. Although sounds quirky, it had to have been one of the best.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
It's Perfect
Today is Christams Eve... it is my absolute favorite day of the year..Easter and Forth of July are close.. But nothing competes to Christmas Eve...
This year I have to spend Christmas Eve at the hotel working until eight pm, in a bathing suit shop where no one will purchase anything past five pm...but whatever, I look at it this way. It is my last Christmas working until my son wants nothing to do with his family....so for now. I will work....
But growing up, I don't know how my mom did it. She worked full time and hosted a huge open house for the eve. I mean people and relatives from all over came to celebrate the night before Christmas. When little, so friends and I would dress up like the nativity people and put on a small play. We were all excited children for the next day. We anticipated what Jolly Ole Saint Nick would be bringing to us that night and we were not so eager to go to bed for fear we would miss out on the party but wanted to sleep right away for fear Santa would not stop by and pay a visit....it was exciting. As time went on and we grew Christmas Eve changed and it was just as wonderful. The gathering became small and intimate. Sometimes we traveled and other times it was just the immediate family. And it was just a perfect. Mid-night mass at St. Johns in Hingham for me became a beautiful tradition and I LOVED the choir as well as listening to Father Robert tell the magnificent story of the birth of Christ. He captivated everyone at eleven thirty at night and you walked out of church with the true essence of what it must have felt like to be a part of that special night when Christ was born.
Now that I am living in Florida and I'm married and expecting a child soon, my mind often thinks about how I would like to begin or carry on traditions of my childhood to my son. Last night we celebrated Christmas with my family. There was seven of us and it was perfect. We had killer food and lots of fun. We did not have many gifts this year because we all did not want any and the gifts are not the real meaning of it all...for us it's Jesus and being together as a family and loving one another. This is what we do cherish the most is family and togetherness. I expressed to Dan many months ago that someday when we live in a bigger home, how I would love to have Christmas Eve as our celebration holiday and have an open house, just like I did as a child. So fun. It would mean so much to us if we did that...Then leaving our family Christmas celebration last night Dan said to me, what a perfect evening it was....I started thinking... maybe we don't need all the hub bub of a big party. It's just the family being together.....It's perfect.
The birth of Christ is celebrated each year with so much to do and if you don't get this gift or that gift or whatever then feelings get hurt and much more. But I cannot get past how I wonder if Mary really knew the magnitude of the birth that she was to deliver us. There was no really hoopla of Jesus when he was born in that stable. Mary may have been just as happy with the gift of her son like any of us..But Gods plan for him was being paved. She was special to God and chosen by Him to birth Jesus and raise him....We cant say what it was really like because we were not there and the story in the Bible tells of a great account. How special that she was chosen to be the mom of our Lord. I love the true simplicity of this holiday.. The real story not all the nonsense that goes with it...I love that a king was born in a manger in a stable in a small town to parents who were probably pretty nervous...as we all are...
the eve of Christmas has so much anticipation and so much meaning to me, I just love it. I cannot wait for the years to come to share so much and learn so much and love so much and continue to give simply on this day. Celebrate Christmas with ease and comfort....with hope for a new year and prayers of health and good will to men. To let the Spirit of Christ touch your life and allow Him and His work to flow through you with so much love. To latch on to those in need and see God work in you life as well as others.
Mary gave birth to Jesus, and it's perfect....just perfect.
This year I have to spend Christmas Eve at the hotel working until eight pm, in a bathing suit shop where no one will purchase anything past five pm...but whatever, I look at it this way. It is my last Christmas working until my son wants nothing to do with his family....so for now. I will work....
But growing up, I don't know how my mom did it. She worked full time and hosted a huge open house for the eve. I mean people and relatives from all over came to celebrate the night before Christmas. When little, so friends and I would dress up like the nativity people and put on a small play. We were all excited children for the next day. We anticipated what Jolly Ole Saint Nick would be bringing to us that night and we were not so eager to go to bed for fear we would miss out on the party but wanted to sleep right away for fear Santa would not stop by and pay a visit....it was exciting. As time went on and we grew Christmas Eve changed and it was just as wonderful. The gathering became small and intimate. Sometimes we traveled and other times it was just the immediate family. And it was just a perfect. Mid-night mass at St. Johns in Hingham for me became a beautiful tradition and I LOVED the choir as well as listening to Father Robert tell the magnificent story of the birth of Christ. He captivated everyone at eleven thirty at night and you walked out of church with the true essence of what it must have felt like to be a part of that special night when Christ was born.
Now that I am living in Florida and I'm married and expecting a child soon, my mind often thinks about how I would like to begin or carry on traditions of my childhood to my son. Last night we celebrated Christmas with my family. There was seven of us and it was perfect. We had killer food and lots of fun. We did not have many gifts this year because we all did not want any and the gifts are not the real meaning of it all...for us it's Jesus and being together as a family and loving one another. This is what we do cherish the most is family and togetherness. I expressed to Dan many months ago that someday when we live in a bigger home, how I would love to have Christmas Eve as our celebration holiday and have an open house, just like I did as a child. So fun. It would mean so much to us if we did that...Then leaving our family Christmas celebration last night Dan said to me, what a perfect evening it was....I started thinking... maybe we don't need all the hub bub of a big party. It's just the family being together.....It's perfect.
The birth of Christ is celebrated each year with so much to do and if you don't get this gift or that gift or whatever then feelings get hurt and much more. But I cannot get past how I wonder if Mary really knew the magnitude of the birth that she was to deliver us. There was no really hoopla of Jesus when he was born in that stable. Mary may have been just as happy with the gift of her son like any of us..But Gods plan for him was being paved. She was special to God and chosen by Him to birth Jesus and raise him....We cant say what it was really like because we were not there and the story in the Bible tells of a great account. How special that she was chosen to be the mom of our Lord. I love the true simplicity of this holiday.. The real story not all the nonsense that goes with it...I love that a king was born in a manger in a stable in a small town to parents who were probably pretty nervous...as we all are...
the eve of Christmas has so much anticipation and so much meaning to me, I just love it. I cannot wait for the years to come to share so much and learn so much and love so much and continue to give simply on this day. Celebrate Christmas with ease and comfort....with hope for a new year and prayers of health and good will to men. To let the Spirit of Christ touch your life and allow Him and His work to flow through you with so much love. To latch on to those in need and see God work in you life as well as others.
Mary gave birth to Jesus, and it's perfect....just perfect.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Seven Year Itch....
Today is December 19, 2009. My husband and I have officially been married for seven years.
I like this because I love him so much...Have you ever thought back at the guys you dated and THOUGHT in your youth that you would marry...and then when you find out what they are like today and what they are doing today...thinking that you could have been a part of their train wrecks or successes... I'm good.
We were married in Marco Island, FL at the Marriott Beach Resort. It was at about 7pm, with maybe thirty people watching the "consomit bachelor" say "I do" to me. The one that roped him in and 'showed him the way...' (not really) In seven years I think we have shown each other the way...The hotel was decorated for Christmas and everything was beautiful for us. Just what we wanted. Nothing fancy or loud of over the top. just us. they did such a beautiful job....
And for seven years Dan has been putting up with me and I with him. Lots of ups and not to many downs. Lots to look forward to and plenty to laugh about when we look back. One anniversary we picked up our little Miles at the shelter and brought him home and kept him for ours...
We don't do anything fancy on this day, we just like to be together you know. But I have to be honest. I still LOVE my husband so very much. I always hear stories of some people who have been married for a shorter amount of time that are bad mouthing their spouse or splitting up of whatever, but I cannot fathom that. I love to be home when Dan gets home from work, of love to wrap my arms around him and feel safe. I love to love on him and take care of him and I miss him when we are not together....It's just all the right thing for us... Us being together. We are not the argue type and we disagree on stuff...yes, but we respect each other so much and sacrifice for each other so well. We just love each other and are so grateful for that.
Now we will add our son to the mix of our union. We added a dog so why not a kid. But you know what, each day is a new one with my husband. It is a blessed on e with him and a loving one with him. I am his biggest fan and the neck that turns his head...but after seven years.. I am still SOOOO happy...
Needless to say, there are no signs of a Seven Year Itch....
I like this because I love him so much...Have you ever thought back at the guys you dated and THOUGHT in your youth that you would marry...and then when you find out what they are like today and what they are doing today...thinking that you could have been a part of their train wrecks or successes... I'm good.
We were married in Marco Island, FL at the Marriott Beach Resort. It was at about 7pm, with maybe thirty people watching the "consomit bachelor" say "I do" to me. The one that roped him in and 'showed him the way...' (not really) In seven years I think we have shown each other the way...The hotel was decorated for Christmas and everything was beautiful for us. Just what we wanted. Nothing fancy or loud of over the top. just us. they did such a beautiful job....
And for seven years Dan has been putting up with me and I with him. Lots of ups and not to many downs. Lots to look forward to and plenty to laugh about when we look back. One anniversary we picked up our little Miles at the shelter and brought him home and kept him for ours...
We don't do anything fancy on this day, we just like to be together you know. But I have to be honest. I still LOVE my husband so very much. I always hear stories of some people who have been married for a shorter amount of time that are bad mouthing their spouse or splitting up of whatever, but I cannot fathom that. I love to be home when Dan gets home from work, of love to wrap my arms around him and feel safe. I love to love on him and take care of him and I miss him when we are not together....It's just all the right thing for us... Us being together. We are not the argue type and we disagree on stuff...yes, but we respect each other so much and sacrifice for each other so well. We just love each other and are so grateful for that.
Now we will add our son to the mix of our union. We added a dog so why not a kid. But you know what, each day is a new one with my husband. It is a blessed on e with him and a loving one with him. I am his biggest fan and the neck that turns his head...but after seven years.. I am still SOOOO happy...
Needless to say, there are no signs of a Seven Year Itch....
Friday, December 18, 2009
That Kinda Morning....
It's 10am and I am still in my pajamas... Not because I am sick but because I am lazy at the moment... or this morning....
I worked last night fro 3-9pm and tonight from 3-8pm. I have become the "fill in night bitch" as me and my co-workers are calling my new position. I really do not like working nights anymore. I had done it for OH.... lets see fifteen years maybe. So when I climbed on bored at the hotel, eager and ready, I was blessed with all daytime shitf working . Selling retail in some great shops....(really it's retail, it's not as exciting as I just made it out to be). But lately in the past month or two I have been what I call banished to the Boutique, (the ladies dress shop..which is really not all that bad) but night time work. Okay that does suck. I have an opposite schedule of my husband and he hates it, BUT, i am not making any waves with this one...think about it... The way it works in the department is... IF you stand up for yourself, call out sick, make a suggestion or even just comment on something .. you are black listed. It happens all the time, each day and everyday to my co-workers. I see it and hear it. I have also heard a few negative comments about me from the blacklisters. I really could care less too. Because I have like what 7,8 weeks left before I am done and have my baby...so this is why I am not rocking the boat. No point. I was asked to work Christmas, I said sure, cause it will be the last Christmas I work. One of the blacklisters looked at me with a funny expression... I rubbed my belly and walked away..My life outside the hotel is far wore wonderful than my life INSIDE the hotel. Nothing is more important to me than my family... Not even selling the latest style of Trina Turk dresses......TRUTH be told.
Okay, the point of my story is this night time shit has me all off kilter. I have been on a set schedule with everything and have loved my life. Up early and get things done before work and home and get more things done. It works for me and Dan and Miles... So now I am tired in the morning. But I usually try to keep things the way they were before the night shift hit me again.
Today was different. The other night I has such shitty sleep. I have this pregnant thing going on and it comes with something called Restless Leg Syndrome. Can't stand it and keeps me awake. So not much sleep has been going on, plus all the other shit that is happening around me in my world....Dan's little old dad had a stroke and is in hospital...my husband is depressed with that one, I have to try to be the cheerleader, work, bake a baby, get ready for a baby, pay bills, keep up with he shopping and cooking along with... plan a Christmas with my family. DO the Christmas shopping, have an anniversary, get some sex in there somewhere, take care of the dog, wonder how much it will cost to have my computer fixed and more... You know... the basic holiday shit.
I did however get good sleep last night but woke up to pouring rain. FINE with me. It was pissing rain, coming down like Niagara falls out of the side of the gutters. Sheets, it was great. I watched it from the bed. Miles took his time getting on top of the bed this morning like he does each day....I put a movie in that a friend lent me and laid there listening to the rain and watching a cute movie. I was so happy. Every so often I would stretch my legs and feel the soreness in my feet form being on them so much at work. I would rollover and get in a comfy position and take a deep breath and relax. I would feel my son move inside me. I would scratch Miles' belly and find happiness. The rain kept us in and groggy. It was great. Just cooked and egg and now I am sharing this with you.....
It may sound funny to you since I spent so much time in bed with my chest cold, but there was no relaxing there. When I am on the mend from something I am not relaxing....Please note I am not one to relax period. To much to do and not enough time to do it....Okay there really is... but there is always something else AND I am moving a bit slower these days since I am growing. It's a concept, an idea that relaxing is good for you, it is good for you.. this idea, is healthy but it is not followed anymore by me with this morning as an exception. I have enjoyed the morning.
It will rain all day and most likely flood the streets, slow the traffic down and all will be a mess, but for the few hours I really only had to myself, it was perfect. It was that kinda morning....
I worked last night fro 3-9pm and tonight from 3-8pm. I have become the "fill in night bitch" as me and my co-workers are calling my new position. I really do not like working nights anymore. I had done it for OH.... lets see fifteen years maybe. So when I climbed on bored at the hotel, eager and ready, I was blessed with all daytime shitf working . Selling retail in some great shops....(really it's retail, it's not as exciting as I just made it out to be). But lately in the past month or two I have been what I call banished to the Boutique, (the ladies dress shop..which is really not all that bad) but night time work. Okay that does suck. I have an opposite schedule of my husband and he hates it, BUT, i am not making any waves with this one...think about it... The way it works in the department is... IF you stand up for yourself, call out sick, make a suggestion or even just comment on something .. you are black listed. It happens all the time, each day and everyday to my co-workers. I see it and hear it. I have also heard a few negative comments about me from the blacklisters. I really could care less too. Because I have like what 7,8 weeks left before I am done and have my baby...so this is why I am not rocking the boat. No point. I was asked to work Christmas, I said sure, cause it will be the last Christmas I work. One of the blacklisters looked at me with a funny expression... I rubbed my belly and walked away..My life outside the hotel is far wore wonderful than my life INSIDE the hotel. Nothing is more important to me than my family... Not even selling the latest style of Trina Turk dresses......TRUTH be told.
Okay, the point of my story is this night time shit has me all off kilter. I have been on a set schedule with everything and have loved my life. Up early and get things done before work and home and get more things done. It works for me and Dan and Miles... So now I am tired in the morning. But I usually try to keep things the way they were before the night shift hit me again.
Today was different. The other night I has such shitty sleep. I have this pregnant thing going on and it comes with something called Restless Leg Syndrome. Can't stand it and keeps me awake. So not much sleep has been going on, plus all the other shit that is happening around me in my world....Dan's little old dad had a stroke and is in hospital...my husband is depressed with that one, I have to try to be the cheerleader, work, bake a baby, get ready for a baby, pay bills, keep up with he shopping and cooking along with... plan a Christmas with my family. DO the Christmas shopping, have an anniversary, get some sex in there somewhere, take care of the dog, wonder how much it will cost to have my computer fixed and more... You know... the basic holiday shit.
I did however get good sleep last night but woke up to pouring rain. FINE with me. It was pissing rain, coming down like Niagara falls out of the side of the gutters. Sheets, it was great. I watched it from the bed. Miles took his time getting on top of the bed this morning like he does each day....I put a movie in that a friend lent me and laid there listening to the rain and watching a cute movie. I was so happy. Every so often I would stretch my legs and feel the soreness in my feet form being on them so much at work. I would rollover and get in a comfy position and take a deep breath and relax. I would feel my son move inside me. I would scratch Miles' belly and find happiness. The rain kept us in and groggy. It was great. Just cooked and egg and now I am sharing this with you.....
It may sound funny to you since I spent so much time in bed with my chest cold, but there was no relaxing there. When I am on the mend from something I am not relaxing....Please note I am not one to relax period. To much to do and not enough time to do it....Okay there really is... but there is always something else AND I am moving a bit slower these days since I am growing. It's a concept, an idea that relaxing is good for you, it is good for you.. this idea, is healthy but it is not followed anymore by me with this morning as an exception. I have enjoyed the morning.
It will rain all day and most likely flood the streets, slow the traffic down and all will be a mess, but for the few hours I really only had to myself, it was perfect. It was that kinda morning....
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Food....
We were watching the movie 'Lethal Weapon 4' the other night. Dan had been wanting to see it because in this movie, Rene Ruso's charater is having Mel Gibson's baby. Dan likes to pull out movies that have bad guys and shoot em up scenes and babies....
Anyway... there was this part in the movie that Rene Russo was making breakfast and she and Mel Gibson were talking and she said the wisest pregnant words I have heard through my entire seven months of being pregnant with my little son....."Nothing stands in between a pregnant lady and food." I laughed sooo hard because it is the truth.
In my house we eat. That is our nature. We are fun eaters, social eaters, emotional eaters and all the eaters you can think of, we were them. How my sister stayed sooo thin is impressive...But when you are pregnant.... it really is an open door to eat. I have had a few cravings here and there.. taco bell at a random time, ice cream in the middle of the day, watermelon as if it's going out of style, (now it's just out of season) and I have bypassed pasta which is unheard of in my family....but fear not the wan for bread and cheese are still there. Lots of milk and a ton of orange juice... That's really the extent of the CRAVINGS so far....However....there is way more to this story.....
Dan has been great at deciding what we should have for dinner. I appreciate that. Since I am at work all day too, I just cannot add another decision to make to my plate so I let Dan do it... It's a kind gesture to me and he always asks what I would like... I usually do not care.. because I really don't...BUT once it has been decided on then there is no stopping me.... I could have a HUGE fruit salad in front of me and eat the entire thing... I could have a steak in front of me and eat it all...(not really a steak fan)..One time before Thanksgiving, Dan's dad came to stay with us and our plan was to have burgers for dinner...but it was raining so I stopped at the store and got a meatloaf on the way home w/ all kind of trimmings to go with it. I was pushing the boys to eat it up so there would not be any leftovers.....I ate it up.. I cannot stand meatloaf...I made so much of it when his dad lived with us that I really got over it, but this night I could not stop.
Cole slaw is another thing i would never give the time of day too and I cannot get enough of...Popsicles now are the rave for me... You know I will just eat and not get full. It's funny. I eat a lot of fruit and salads than any thing else, but the amount I eat is a riot. I laugh at myself in amazement. I used to HATE the food that they fed us at work. It's a free lunch and you get what they give you or the choice of deli meats and a gross salad bar. I mean people get sick from this place...Cant stop myself from eating there....I even bring food to work with me....
A few weeks ago it was a Sunday morning and I was heading into work... On Sundays the hotel cafeteria provides a small breakfast for the employees..so I was getting ready to leave and Dan said..."you are leaving so early" and I said..."Free breakfast in the ICU." kissed him and off I went.
Now I sound as if I have gained loads of weight from my eating binges...but I really have not. Yes I have put on some and will end this pregnant venture under what I had estimated, but so far so good...Again I'm not into the sweets and cakes and cookies and stuff, but the carbs are not that helpful either... it's all good though. Joey will be like his Grandfather....(my dad) I bet a big boy with a big appetite... Yet I am fine if he ends up like Dan... ( a small appetite) A hotel buffet which is so good, will make money on Dan because he is such a small eater where they would lose money on me....
....An open door for food.... A love for food...a baby growing inside me that needs food....OOO... one more very important thing.... My biggest advice to ANY woman out there who is having a baby... Stay away from the FOOD NETWORK channel.. Not a good channel to watch. You will want to eat everything that is on....But in the end...It's all about FOOD.
Anyway... there was this part in the movie that Rene Russo was making breakfast and she and Mel Gibson were talking and she said the wisest pregnant words I have heard through my entire seven months of being pregnant with my little son....."Nothing stands in between a pregnant lady and food." I laughed sooo hard because it is the truth.
In my house we eat. That is our nature. We are fun eaters, social eaters, emotional eaters and all the eaters you can think of, we were them. How my sister stayed sooo thin is impressive...But when you are pregnant.... it really is an open door to eat. I have had a few cravings here and there.. taco bell at a random time, ice cream in the middle of the day, watermelon as if it's going out of style, (now it's just out of season) and I have bypassed pasta which is unheard of in my family....but fear not the wan for bread and cheese are still there. Lots of milk and a ton of orange juice... That's really the extent of the CRAVINGS so far....However....there is way more to this story.....
Dan has been great at deciding what we should have for dinner. I appreciate that. Since I am at work all day too, I just cannot add another decision to make to my plate so I let Dan do it... It's a kind gesture to me and he always asks what I would like... I usually do not care.. because I really don't...BUT once it has been decided on then there is no stopping me.... I could have a HUGE fruit salad in front of me and eat the entire thing... I could have a steak in front of me and eat it all...(not really a steak fan)..One time before Thanksgiving, Dan's dad came to stay with us and our plan was to have burgers for dinner...but it was raining so I stopped at the store and got a meatloaf on the way home w/ all kind of trimmings to go with it. I was pushing the boys to eat it up so there would not be any leftovers.....I ate it up.. I cannot stand meatloaf...I made so much of it when his dad lived with us that I really got over it, but this night I could not stop.
Cole slaw is another thing i would never give the time of day too and I cannot get enough of...Popsicles now are the rave for me... You know I will just eat and not get full. It's funny. I eat a lot of fruit and salads than any thing else, but the amount I eat is a riot. I laugh at myself in amazement. I used to HATE the food that they fed us at work. It's a free lunch and you get what they give you or the choice of deli meats and a gross salad bar. I mean people get sick from this place...Cant stop myself from eating there....I even bring food to work with me....
A few weeks ago it was a Sunday morning and I was heading into work... On Sundays the hotel cafeteria provides a small breakfast for the employees..so I was getting ready to leave and Dan said..."you are leaving so early" and I said..."Free breakfast in the ICU." kissed him and off I went.
Now I sound as if I have gained loads of weight from my eating binges...but I really have not. Yes I have put on some and will end this pregnant venture under what I had estimated, but so far so good...Again I'm not into the sweets and cakes and cookies and stuff, but the carbs are not that helpful either... it's all good though. Joey will be like his Grandfather....(my dad) I bet a big boy with a big appetite... Yet I am fine if he ends up like Dan... ( a small appetite) A hotel buffet which is so good, will make money on Dan because he is such a small eater where they would lose money on me....
....An open door for food.... A love for food...a baby growing inside me that needs food....OOO... one more very important thing.... My biggest advice to ANY woman out there who is having a baby... Stay away from the FOOD NETWORK channel.. Not a good channel to watch. You will want to eat everything that is on....But in the end...It's all about FOOD.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
That Glass of Wine Soon...
I ran into an old friend the other day...it was kind of funny. We sort of dropped out of being friends 'cause she had a kid.
That sounds almost funny, but its a world that I know not a lot about to take in...I mean yeah I am pregnant and will be a mom in like 2 1/2 months, but even with all the babysitting and daycare I did...... I was not a mom...
So there is this label that is put on you when you chose to be single, or childless. Some people are childless because they cannot have children. Then the decision on living a life with out children is their choice or adoption. But that is entirely different. You get the pity party "oh I am sorry" bit from people and the "we're praying for Gods will for you" bit.
But when making a conscious decision to be single or childless. Funny what society makes of you... Its like you are blacklisted..completely. You are not asked to babysit your friends kids. go to recitals and events at their kids school and sometime just not be friends with them anymore because what could you possible have to offer in on the conversation or their life since you are not a mom... Yet funny how much fun we had before their kid showed up and what we had in common...just being married and silly. I use to go to this church before I got married..(Dan and I were living together but not married) and people would ask me if I was married and when I said "no" ( I would never tell them I was living with my boyfriend..for fear they would cast me out even more) they would say.."oh" and turn away.....Then when I DID get married but we chose not to have a family..and I was asked if I had any children.. and again I would reply "no" the women would look at me and turn away. Happens all the time. As this was never the case and so not normal.. See a stigma in peoples mind and completely labled by other women...
So she was all giddy when she found out I was pregnant and happy for us to know that we will have a life with a child.
Yeah....it really made me stop and think about my own future actions.
I have friends that do not have kids and I wonder if I will still be friends with them after my son Joey arrives? I really like these women that I know that are not moms and I wonder if I will become one of THOSE women who only want to be around other moms and kids. Ummm I know there is this common bond that you have with others, but there is also the bond that I still have with the others of just something like womanhood that I really don't want to give up.
Hey I am sooo excited about being "Joey's mom" and may forever in my life be labled as that..in fact there is a woman at work who now greets me as that. I dig it. And I am ready for that too, but do I want to give up more people who are friends with me and who have touched my life with stories and laughter and sisterhood, just because they don't have kids?
I have prayed that the Lord will not take that away from me. these women or friendships that I have made. I want to go to their house and watch the fun TV shows we talk about all the time together and laugh about our husbands and share storries of family... It's just as nice, but dropping someone because they are no longer on the "mom level" you are on is silly.
I can't say it will or will not happen with me. I am excited for my new journey that I am being put on..but I also have the blossoms from THIS life that still need nurturing. We have no idea how important these people are... and what we can learn from the... the common bond may not be motherhood, but it could be womanhood....
I'll be over for that glass of wine soon.....
That sounds almost funny, but its a world that I know not a lot about to take in...I mean yeah I am pregnant and will be a mom in like 2 1/2 months, but even with all the babysitting and daycare I did...... I was not a mom...
So there is this label that is put on you when you chose to be single, or childless. Some people are childless because they cannot have children. Then the decision on living a life with out children is their choice or adoption. But that is entirely different. You get the pity party "oh I am sorry" bit from people and the "we're praying for Gods will for you" bit.
But when making a conscious decision to be single or childless. Funny what society makes of you... Its like you are blacklisted..completely. You are not asked to babysit your friends kids. go to recitals and events at their kids school and sometime just not be friends with them anymore because what could you possible have to offer in on the conversation or their life since you are not a mom... Yet funny how much fun we had before their kid showed up and what we had in common...just being married and silly. I use to go to this church before I got married..(Dan and I were living together but not married) and people would ask me if I was married and when I said "no" ( I would never tell them I was living with my boyfriend..for fear they would cast me out even more) they would say.."oh" and turn away.....Then when I DID get married but we chose not to have a family..and I was asked if I had any children.. and again I would reply "no" the women would look at me and turn away. Happens all the time. As this was never the case and so not normal.. See a stigma in peoples mind and completely labled by other women...
So she was all giddy when she found out I was pregnant and happy for us to know that we will have a life with a child.
Yeah....it really made me stop and think about my own future actions.
I have friends that do not have kids and I wonder if I will still be friends with them after my son Joey arrives? I really like these women that I know that are not moms and I wonder if I will become one of THOSE women who only want to be around other moms and kids. Ummm I know there is this common bond that you have with others, but there is also the bond that I still have with the others of just something like womanhood that I really don't want to give up.
Hey I am sooo excited about being "Joey's mom" and may forever in my life be labled as that..in fact there is a woman at work who now greets me as that. I dig it. And I am ready for that too, but do I want to give up more people who are friends with me and who have touched my life with stories and laughter and sisterhood, just because they don't have kids?
I have prayed that the Lord will not take that away from me. these women or friendships that I have made. I want to go to their house and watch the fun TV shows we talk about all the time together and laugh about our husbands and share storries of family... It's just as nice, but dropping someone because they are no longer on the "mom level" you are on is silly.
I can't say it will or will not happen with me. I am excited for my new journey that I am being put on..but I also have the blossoms from THIS life that still need nurturing. We have no idea how important these people are... and what we can learn from the... the common bond may not be motherhood, but it could be womanhood....
I'll be over for that glass of wine soon.....
Friday, December 11, 2009
Kinda Liked It....
So as written before I have been sick with a chest cold. My stint in the ER and home to rest for a day. Then off to work I went. I came home from work and felt like I was gonna die (not really).
I had the next day off from work but had to work the day after. I called in for that day and have been in bed for three days sleeping resting and recovering. Taking what little useless medicine I can take with out harming my little man inside me.
My sister went to the store for me and brought me some yummy Popsicles...which I have been addicted to and orange juice and some other stuff. I can stomach the cold but not the hot so tea and honey does nothing for me. My husband has been working but he really is the best caretaker I could have. He just knows what to do and what to say and when to answer. He makes me feel so much better...(is that strange after 7 years of marriage?)
Miles has been next to me the entire time and wont leave my side. Since Dan has been at work I have had to muster up a bit of energy in the morning to take him for his little walk. Luckily it's been hot and humid and Miles does not like that weather so the walks have not been that long, but by my side in bed he has rested too. When I reach over and scratch his coat, he loves it and so do I. He too has been my best medicine. Miles just goes with the flow and does what he needs to do...which is be with me.
Not sure how it happened but by getting sick it has really put me in a zone of rest. I cant really say relaxation because I have felt so shitty. But I have stayed in the house. If I was not on the couch finishing up a puzzle I was in bed, sleeping. When I am sick there really is not much I want to do. I cant find the stamina to turn the computer on, or even watch TV. It bugs me. I cant read a book cause I just don't feel like it and all I want to do is lay there. Dan knows I must not be feeling well when the TV is not on. It's fine too. Daytime TV sucks...
My point in all this is. I have really enjoyed this illness. I know it's hard to wrap your head around but it's true. I have had to be careful in what medicines I take, I have wanted to just stay in the house....which is very unlike me. (I am an on the go chick and lets get it done woman) and I have not felt the need to get out in the world and change it. I just want to be at home. Is there an underlying message here.
I think I am settling myself into life in home for a bit when baby comes. I know there will be people around and stuff, but I have liked the lapse of urge to get out there and live. I like the thought of just living in.
All I can say is I am happy that we have not started to put the baby's room together. i would have bypassed the sleep and rest and finished it in 24 hours. This is what I do and how I roll. I am glad that the only attention I have had to give baby is that of him kicking and punching me constantly inside me. I have loved putting the remote on my belly and watching him kick it off. I like feeling his kicks and punches and falling more and more in love with my little two and a half pound "parasite" as my Dr. calls it.
Being sick normally sucks in all directions, but this time...I Kinda Liked It.
I had the next day off from work but had to work the day after. I called in for that day and have been in bed for three days sleeping resting and recovering. Taking what little useless medicine I can take with out harming my little man inside me.
My sister went to the store for me and brought me some yummy Popsicles...which I have been addicted to and orange juice and some other stuff. I can stomach the cold but not the hot so tea and honey does nothing for me. My husband has been working but he really is the best caretaker I could have. He just knows what to do and what to say and when to answer. He makes me feel so much better...(is that strange after 7 years of marriage?)
Miles has been next to me the entire time and wont leave my side. Since Dan has been at work I have had to muster up a bit of energy in the morning to take him for his little walk. Luckily it's been hot and humid and Miles does not like that weather so the walks have not been that long, but by my side in bed he has rested too. When I reach over and scratch his coat, he loves it and so do I. He too has been my best medicine. Miles just goes with the flow and does what he needs to do...which is be with me.
Not sure how it happened but by getting sick it has really put me in a zone of rest. I cant really say relaxation because I have felt so shitty. But I have stayed in the house. If I was not on the couch finishing up a puzzle I was in bed, sleeping. When I am sick there really is not much I want to do. I cant find the stamina to turn the computer on, or even watch TV. It bugs me. I cant read a book cause I just don't feel like it and all I want to do is lay there. Dan knows I must not be feeling well when the TV is not on. It's fine too. Daytime TV sucks...
My point in all this is. I have really enjoyed this illness. I know it's hard to wrap your head around but it's true. I have had to be careful in what medicines I take, I have wanted to just stay in the house....which is very unlike me. (I am an on the go chick and lets get it done woman) and I have not felt the need to get out in the world and change it. I just want to be at home. Is there an underlying message here.
I think I am settling myself into life in home for a bit when baby comes. I know there will be people around and stuff, but I have liked the lapse of urge to get out there and live. I like the thought of just living in.
All I can say is I am happy that we have not started to put the baby's room together. i would have bypassed the sleep and rest and finished it in 24 hours. This is what I do and how I roll. I am glad that the only attention I have had to give baby is that of him kicking and punching me constantly inside me. I have loved putting the remote on my belly and watching him kick it off. I like feeling his kicks and punches and falling more and more in love with my little two and a half pound "parasite" as my Dr. calls it.
Being sick normally sucks in all directions, but this time...I Kinda Liked It.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Our Own Rockefeller Center
A few days before Thanksgiving Dan and I made our annual trip to the "Festival Of Lights" on 3rd street South. We just call it the Lighting of the Christmas Tree.
3rd St.S. is a block of street that has high end shops and restaurants. A few times a year they host fun evenings. Block off the street and have entertainment, street vendors and bands and more. We go every once in a while to see a friend from the hotel play in his band... but usually before Thanksgiving, is the lighting of the Christmas tree in the corner of 12th ave S and 3rd st.
So we go. It's fun and they even set up the street light with fake snow. It will snow around 6:30pm after Santa comes down the street to light the tree outside of 'Tony's on Third'. The snow is actually soap, so the street gets slippery, but the kids LOVE it and it's fun. Santa is brilliant. The mayor of Naples and the Police Captain head the parade which is a block long and they stop at the tree. Santa then gets out of his horse and carriage and lights the tree. The news is there and lots of people.
This year Dan and I planned really well. We got a great parking spot 'cause we headed down much earlier this year. Like at 4pm. things really don't start until 6. But we coped two stools at our favorite restaurant on 3rd. 'The Old Naples Pub' had a few apps and headed out the door in search for Dan's friend who were working the event. Some of the Naples police Officers. These are guys that Dan has known for years and we always see them. It was early enough that we got to spend quite some time talking and catching up. These are great guys and because we don't see them but once a year it is always great to catch up. We walked up and down the street watching all the shows, listening to the bands and found two random chairs on the sidewalk outside the art gallery and ate some kettle corn while watching Santa come down the street and light the big tree. we met up with some friends and walked more. Ended the evening with 'Lenny's Italian Ice' and good laughs. We had a great time....
One thing I noticed was the weather. It was warn. Most times this has been going on it has been cold and kept people away. This year it was SO warm. I was happy for that Italian Ice because it cooled me down, but due to the weather I could not believe the amount of people there. I have never seen that many people at the tree lighting. It seemed funny because we were there so early and then it was like all of a sudden BOOM thousands of people. Incredible. We are not crowd folk but had to muddle our way through it and did so.
It was a great night and cannot wait to bring Joey next year to see all the fun stuff that goes on right down the street from where we live. It's not Rockefeller Center Tree or concerts, but everyone involved does a great job at putting the Christmas spirit in the air. It did feel a lot like being in the middle of New York City with all the people there, but the tree looked perfect this year and the soap snow was wonderful. Santa was so real and the vendors get bigger and bigger each year.
The lighting of the Christmas Tree in downtown Naples has become a tradition for me and Dan. It is our own Rockefeller Center...
Worth Every Minute....
The other night I was not feeling good...It started when I woke up in the morning and just escalated as the day went on. About nine thirty when I headed to bed I could not breath well.
I got out of bed and headed to the couch. I propped myself up and was able to sleep for a short time and then the coughing and gasping started.
I have had this feeling before when I had pneumonia years ago. Tight chest and just cannot breath. Each time I would cough the cough would get harder and harder and I would cough up mucus...I was not going there with this one. But I just could not get a good breath...
Yes, when you are pregnant your body changes so fast and so much happens it's hard to keep up. Your internal organs get all pushed aside from the growth of the baby and the ever expanding uterus. I get that, I can no longer sleep on my back because of compression on my lungs, I know how that feels, This was a little different. In fact it was entirely different. There was not a breath to be had that did not require a struggle.
At about one in the morning Dan came out to the couch and said.."what do you want to do honey?' and I told him I think we need to go to the emergency room. And we were slow moving but we did. Not only did I not feel good about the way I was breathing, but I did not feel good about pulling my husband out of sleep to take me to the hospital....
So we opted for NCH downtown emergency room... I do not like NCH and would rather go to Physicians Regional, but IF they needed to be invasive with treating me then they would send me to North Collier since that hospital has a NICU...so downtown we headed. Really a short drive...about five minutes..MAYBE.
Anyway...long story shorter...if I can....It took forever even with us being like the only people in the emergency room, but I had an xray to check out my lungs...and yes they had me wear a lead apron to shield the baby. Dan and I fell asleep in the hospital bed and the PA came in finally to tell me that there is nothing that can be done for the beginning stages of an upper respiratory infection. Rest, liquid and that's about it. Because everything else could send me into preterm labor...Crap...I still could not breath well, but this is what happens. So we did the right thing 'cause the other day at work the nurse took my blood pressure, and said my pressure was fine but heart rate was a little high...(well the Ritz can do that to you) but my book tells me if my heart rate is high then go to the emergency room or doctor....so my oxygen was low too...the signs were there...but nothing could be done....
Well before we were discharged the nurse Tammy who took care of me and another nurse Eric came in to check the Baby with an ultrasound machine. They had a little monitor and Doppler and told us they just wanted to check the heart rate of the baby. I was elated at four int he morning to see my little man. He was kicking me and I could not only feel him but see him. He was sucking his had and sucking his toes and moving around so much. The nurses were having a great time...
"This is free" they kept saying. "we are not charging you...we just want to make sure all is okay and we are having a good time...it's fun for us, Hope you don't mind?"
"Are you kidding. My next OB apappointment is next week and I was hoping to see my son, but it's just a quick check up. I wont see him 'til maybe January. This is a pleasure."
"This is like Christmas for us." Dan said with amazement and a smile.
We left there at something like 4am. I was a little disappointed that nothing could be done but a little relieved in the sense that it was something than pregnancy... but more over we saw our BIG little man inside me. He is HUGE, for 27 weeks. Incredible for 2 pounds and something like 12-14 inches....I was shocked and happy and joyful and tired...sooo tired. But he was there and okay and tucked in just fine playing around in my belly like he does all the time.
I have been in bed for a few days fighting this thing and luckily no fever at all. It sucked going to the hospital so late and missing sleep and waiting forever and dishing out the co-pay at 4am, but when the two nurses has fun checking our son in my belly and we got to see him happy and moving, heart rate perfect and doing all he is suppose to be doing...getting home by 4:30am was worth every minute.
I got out of bed and headed to the couch. I propped myself up and was able to sleep for a short time and then the coughing and gasping started.
I have had this feeling before when I had pneumonia years ago. Tight chest and just cannot breath. Each time I would cough the cough would get harder and harder and I would cough up mucus...I was not going there with this one. But I just could not get a good breath...
Yes, when you are pregnant your body changes so fast and so much happens it's hard to keep up. Your internal organs get all pushed aside from the growth of the baby and the ever expanding uterus. I get that, I can no longer sleep on my back because of compression on my lungs, I know how that feels, This was a little different. In fact it was entirely different. There was not a breath to be had that did not require a struggle.
At about one in the morning Dan came out to the couch and said.."what do you want to do honey?' and I told him I think we need to go to the emergency room. And we were slow moving but we did. Not only did I not feel good about the way I was breathing, but I did not feel good about pulling my husband out of sleep to take me to the hospital....
So we opted for NCH downtown emergency room... I do not like NCH and would rather go to Physicians Regional, but IF they needed to be invasive with treating me then they would send me to North Collier since that hospital has a NICU...so downtown we headed. Really a short drive...about five minutes..MAYBE.
Anyway...long story shorter...if I can....It took forever even with us being like the only people in the emergency room, but I had an xray to check out my lungs...and yes they had me wear a lead apron to shield the baby. Dan and I fell asleep in the hospital bed and the PA came in finally to tell me that there is nothing that can be done for the beginning stages of an upper respiratory infection. Rest, liquid and that's about it. Because everything else could send me into preterm labor...Crap...I still could not breath well, but this is what happens. So we did the right thing 'cause the other day at work the nurse took my blood pressure, and said my pressure was fine but heart rate was a little high...(well the Ritz can do that to you) but my book tells me if my heart rate is high then go to the emergency room or doctor....so my oxygen was low too...the signs were there...but nothing could be done....
Well before we were discharged the nurse Tammy who took care of me and another nurse Eric came in to check the Baby with an ultrasound machine. They had a little monitor and Doppler and told us they just wanted to check the heart rate of the baby. I was elated at four int he morning to see my little man. He was kicking me and I could not only feel him but see him. He was sucking his had and sucking his toes and moving around so much. The nurses were having a great time...
"This is free" they kept saying. "we are not charging you...we just want to make sure all is okay and we are having a good time...it's fun for us, Hope you don't mind?"
"Are you kidding. My next OB apappointment is next week and I was hoping to see my son, but it's just a quick check up. I wont see him 'til maybe January. This is a pleasure."
"This is like Christmas for us." Dan said with amazement and a smile.
We left there at something like 4am. I was a little disappointed that nothing could be done but a little relieved in the sense that it was something than pregnancy... but more over we saw our BIG little man inside me. He is HUGE, for 27 weeks. Incredible for 2 pounds and something like 12-14 inches....I was shocked and happy and joyful and tired...sooo tired. But he was there and okay and tucked in just fine playing around in my belly like he does all the time.
I have been in bed for a few days fighting this thing and luckily no fever at all. It sucked going to the hospital so late and missing sleep and waiting forever and dishing out the co-pay at 4am, but when the two nurses has fun checking our son in my belly and we got to see him happy and moving, heart rate perfect and doing all he is suppose to be doing...getting home by 4:30am was worth every minute.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
A Joyful Time of Year
We are now into the month of December and time is slipping by really fast. I cannot seem to keep up. I think I would feel the same way if I were not pregnant. Things are just spinning around me and it's all very fast.
Someone asked me if I would like time to hurry up because of the baby.. I said "no". time is going perfectly fine. I seem to like the pace. although i hope I get the chance to get the Christmas Cards out...hmmm next thing i know it's our anniversary...(7 years) and then a week later it's Christmas and then New Years. Is this how fast things have been going. I still think it is august... but with out the heat...
Love December. There is just such a great buzz in the air. It's the lights and the music and the parties and the red and green and the rest of the festivities. Dan and I wanted to get married in December because we both love this month. We are Christmas junkies, although we don;t go Griswold crazy, it's just a beautiful time of year. I cant say that the people of Naples find it in their hearts to have the Christmas spirit and display the "Peace on Earth Good will toward men" attitude. They Don't. Naples is a very selfish place to live. It is rich or seasonal and if you work in a seasonal position for a job, you are selfish. It's all about you and money and making as much as possible so get out of my way.....if you are rich, you just have a "holier than thou attitude". I know there are many of you who agree, you see it everyday. Line in the post office, at CVS, at the Bagel Shop and more and somewhere in that line about ten of the twelve people are complaining that there are not enough service agents and stuff. RECESSION... CUT BACKS... HELLO...
Just how it is down here. What else. This is the Holiday season. The season of the holiday spirit. Hanukkah and Christmas, two very important religious holidays. Love them both, but Love Christmas Eve the most.
It's not a year for us to go hog wild and fully decorate our home this year. We are taking it easy. Dan calls it .."The Williams Touch of Christmas" and we will leave it at that. No tree will adorn the house this year. We are focused on something else... OH BABY.... due to arrive in in early march or late Feb. so we are just trying to get ready for our little Joey. We have some decorations up and it's enough because we know that next year for Joey's first Christmas, we will go all out. Have to ...it's just the way it's done... so for now..we are taking it easy, trying to keep up with the rapidly passing month and loving each other to the best we can.
Ahh December...the conclusion to the year... but a joyful time of year....
Someone asked me if I would like time to hurry up because of the baby.. I said "no". time is going perfectly fine. I seem to like the pace. although i hope I get the chance to get the Christmas Cards out...hmmm next thing i know it's our anniversary...(7 years) and then a week later it's Christmas and then New Years. Is this how fast things have been going. I still think it is august... but with out the heat...
Love December. There is just such a great buzz in the air. It's the lights and the music and the parties and the red and green and the rest of the festivities. Dan and I wanted to get married in December because we both love this month. We are Christmas junkies, although we don;t go Griswold crazy, it's just a beautiful time of year. I cant say that the people of Naples find it in their hearts to have the Christmas spirit and display the "Peace on Earth Good will toward men" attitude. They Don't. Naples is a very selfish place to live. It is rich or seasonal and if you work in a seasonal position for a job, you are selfish. It's all about you and money and making as much as possible so get out of my way.....if you are rich, you just have a "holier than thou attitude". I know there are many of you who agree, you see it everyday. Line in the post office, at CVS, at the Bagel Shop and more and somewhere in that line about ten of the twelve people are complaining that there are not enough service agents and stuff. RECESSION... CUT BACKS... HELLO...
Just how it is down here. What else. This is the Holiday season. The season of the holiday spirit. Hanukkah and Christmas, two very important religious holidays. Love them both, but Love Christmas Eve the most.
It's not a year for us to go hog wild and fully decorate our home this year. We are taking it easy. Dan calls it .."The Williams Touch of Christmas" and we will leave it at that. No tree will adorn the house this year. We are focused on something else... OH BABY.... due to arrive in in early march or late Feb. so we are just trying to get ready for our little Joey. We have some decorations up and it's enough because we know that next year for Joey's first Christmas, we will go all out. Have to ...it's just the way it's done... so for now..we are taking it easy, trying to keep up with the rapidly passing month and loving each other to the best we can.
Ahh December...the conclusion to the year... but a joyful time of year....
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