I have a friend of mine who has a good blog. She posts most stuff on there about her kids. She is so ready to have another... but the last blog I read of hers she was writing about loving her unborn child so much... basically, the..."How can I love something so much that I have never met?" bit.
Now I understand, although I have not REALLY felt my baby move inside me...(little punches here and there..and the book says 22 weeks I will really start feeling stuff..) I have seen my baby with the help of ultra sounds. I have heard the heart beat which puts my mind to so much ease, and I have even watched the baby eat from inside me...I am not one for the fancy- shmancy high tech ultra sounds, the blurry one at the Dr.s office is just fine...but it was the last visit I had there that really sealed the deal for me.
I am currently 20 weeks pregnant..at the moment..if you want to get technical bordering 21 weeks...(my due date seems to change each visit) BUT....the nuts thing is I am HALF way through the job I am doing. Soon eviction time will be coming for this baby and it's new home will be in my arms and Dan's arms. this will be great.
During your 20 week visit to the OBGYN...a lot has happened to the baby since your last visit..but mostly this visit is your half way point. So I have made it 20 weeks through and I have 20 more weeks until baby comes. That is scary really. Although it was a long hot summer, it seems that we just found out and it seems impossible that 20 weeks has passed so soon. But they can also tell you the sex of the baby is you choose to know. Within 20 weeks the baby's sexual organs have developed well enough for the ultrasound to say..."Think Pink or Go Blue."
In our case, we had all but only a few people tell us I was having a girl. We were ready to have Bonnie at the Dr.'s tell us that we are having a girl...With a conversation of a friend at work during lunch one day...she said to me that is I keep getting my hopes up for a girl, what if I am told it's a boy and how disappointed I will be...Dan too, cause he really wanted a girl. I thought long and hard on her statement and started to focus on who do I know that has boys and who did I take care of that had boys.....
My babysitting really consisted of girls, and if there was a boy it was random...It just happened that way too. But then I thought of Reed McLeod. Curt and Becky's son. Thier second child. They were so excited for a boy after having Lindsey...(let's face it she was a tough baby), but it seemed that the moment Reed was born and brought home, a calm came into the house. He sought peace and it was there. He loved their dog too.Reed and Rossi were the best of friends. I think somewhere I have a photo of Reed and Rossi asleep together. When it came time to put Rossi down, Reed held her to her last breath.. Rossi went to doggie heaven in the arms of her best friend Reed. I also took care of Carson, of Jessica and Carson. Carson has two sisters and was all boy. Although he and Jessica shared a room, he was the rough and tough and tumbley guy. Carson started tackle football when I started to care for them. Jessica was a cheerleader and Carson played football. I spent my time at the football field at practices and Saturday games watching Carson. I could look over my shoulder and see Jess practice with her team, but watching Carson was so fun. Dan and my folks would come to practice and games to watch the football. I remember mom saying to me.."it's nice to have a boy and do these things." she was right. We just had a good time when it was Carson and I at home before Jess came home. It's a different dynamic and I thought hard about it and told Dan how I was feeling if Bonnie tells us we will have a son.... He agreed too...and you know what...
Bonnie told us we were having a son.
At that moment, a sudden peace came over me. My heart filled instantly with love for this little boy that is growing inside me. Dan could not believe his excitement either. He is so proud of the fact that we have been given a son. I shared with him ho unworthy I felt too to be carrying a boy. It would be different if it was a daughter, but a boy. Our thought process has gone from pink to blue really fast and all seems right.
We are naming our boy Joseph Scott Williams... we will call him Joey or Joe, whichever... Joseph was my father's name. Dan loved my dad for the time he knew him. He would spend time with my dad and hang on every word that he would say. Dan said right from the beginning too,"If we have a boy, I want him to be named after your father. I loved your father and I think it should be this way." Naturally I agreed. Scott is Dan's middle name and he wanted to carry that on...
So we are set. Joey Williams will bless this little family of three to make four, sometime between March 3-11 of 2010. Although my mind is racing and spinning of everything we need and have to do. I stop and think...It's all good. I have heaps of time and a lot of help and tons of love.
WE ARE GONNA HAVE A BOY......
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